Writing Workshop – I shall not be moved!

February 4, 2010 at 8:41 pm | Posted in Daily Life, Mummy Bloggers | 3 Comments
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This is my first writing workshop, thanks for the leads from Sleep is for the Weak, had a hard time choosing, but thanks to my parents have opted for ‘a time I have refused to compromise‘!

So, in 2003 in sunny Crete I met my now husband.  A true holiday romance, and the person who turned out to be my Mr Right.  We married in the summer of 2007, and the bear was born in August 2008.

Our first ever kiss

The first few years of our relationship were pretty tough.  For one reason.  He lived in Stoke, and I lived in Oxford.

The M6 became my arch enemy.  The 5.30am start reduced me to tears once every two weeks.  At the time I was a smoker so I drove bleary eyed equipped with Marlboro Lights and Red Bull.  My god looking back I must have felt (and looked) like crap!

I’m not the patient, go with the flow type.  Once I knew he was the one (after 20 days when I asked him in a bar after a few vodkas if he loved me), then I wanted the engagement, wedding and family.  I used to be, what you would call – high maintenance.

The biggest thing my parents credit my husband with is how he has mellowed me.

I can’t remember how long it was, but between 6-12 months after we got together, my husband decided to buy a house with his best friend and move another 30 or so miles up the M6.  It was partly pride, partly concern about commitment, but this wasn’t the direction I was hoping for in our relationship.  I didn’t hide my disappointment very well.

Like I said in my life plan, I had it all set out.  And part of that plan was living in Oxford.  Not Stoke.  Now that sounds really, really selfish and although I was willing to discuss, this is home and I wanted to stay.  Family, friends, at the time my job, my lovely flat were all here.

I wanted to be open to suggestion but I knew deep down I desperately wanted to be off the Bicester junction of the M40, not junction 15 of the M6.

In 2005 husband decided to transfer to the Oxford area.  I was thrilled.  It wasn’t an overnight decision and I went easy on my persuasion (kind of), again this sounds really selfish.  Now, when we talk about those early years husband says he would always have been happy to move to Oxford, his family were used to him living away with his job, but because I was quite pushy, it made him adamant to do it on his terms, when he was ready.

Fairy nuff.  I guess.  I understand, so I learnt a lesson there.

We were dealt a blow when his profession put a recruitment freeze on.  But it came as a blessing in disguise as he opted instead to apply for a London position and landed his dream role.

We haven’t looked back.  Yes the commute can be tedious.  Yes it means he sees a little less of the bear, but he’s totally in love with his job and is happier as a result.

My parents worship him (yes, you do!) and he seems to have made them into a right pair of softies with his warmth.

So, I didn’t compromise, my husband knew it was a sticking point for me, and he taught me some valuable lessons too – it’s ok to want what you want, but be willing to wait, and be supportive of the impact that will have on others.

Thanks again to Josie at Sleep is for the Weak for introducing me to writing workshops for mummy bloggers x

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3 Comments »

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  1. Ah you sound a lot like me, I am VERY impatient, but I do believe things will always work out in the end.
    You know Stoke wouldn’t of been so bad, I lived just outside Stoke for 8 years and I loved it esp. the oakcakes!!!! YUM!

    • ooh yes oakcakes with bacon, cheese and beans!

  2. Ah, I love that first photo of you two – its just so sweet.


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