What happens when you stop nagging?September 20, 2012 at 1:03 pm | Posted in Daily Life | 9 Comments
Tags: husband and wife, marital bliss, Marital rifts, Nagging wife
I’m always up for a challenge, but come on, some things are impossible, surely. So the challenge – no nagging my long-suffering husband for a whole week, not a word. Personally I think he’s got it too good, so let’s steer clear of the long-suffering for now.
Anyway, this little challenge came about after my husband made a comment a few weeks ago. “Put the shampoo back by the bath after you’ve washed your hair in the sink, pleeeeasssseee” I hollered, the same as I do most mornings. To which, on this occasion, instead of ignoring me he calmly replied “Would it really be sooooo bad if I didn’t?” and proceeded to remind me that I always leave my orange juice glass on the kitchen side in the mornings with a quarter of an inch of juice remaining – like I can’t put it in the dishwasher, or god forbid wash it up in case I decide to return and drink the last drop before dashing out of the door.
So I thought, would it really be so bad? But then there are lots of things that niggle me and what if all of them happened and I didn’t put things back in their place, would I have a heart attack? Would it send me to an early grave? Would the house just implode or start to resemble something from an episode of secret hoarders?
So I decided to find out. One week, zero nagging.
And what do you know I was quite pleasantly surprised by the results. I shall summarise my findings for ease.
– The butter knife eventually moves from the work surface to the sink and sometimes even the dishwasher if you leave it there and remain silent. Even the toast crumbs are wiped up. Let’s forget about the water marks left on the counter from the cloth shall we; no one is perfect.
– The microwave door closes after just a matter of hours if you keep calm and refrain from shrieking “close the microwave door will you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”. This is one of my biggest peeves, but I coped, I left it open, little internal light blaring away.
– The washing up liquid does not however return to the ‘washing aids’ tray on the window sill, it continues to sit quite happily on the side of the sink, taunting me. But as my husband said, would it really be so bad if it stayed there?! I guess not.
– Dinner didn’t get made on the second of only two occasions this year I’ve asked husband to cook. But he was devastated when he realised his forgetfulness and I didn’t remind him, and he did try really hard to resolve the issue so that I could go to my antenatal class – one cremated corned beef hash later, a second joint attempt and I decided I didn’t much like sitting and imagining my womb as a hammock anyway so we had a nice night on the sofa with hash mark 2.
The overall outcome – a happier home. Ahh, marital bliss. Sure, there will still be days when I want to punch him for leaving a wet towel on my side of the bed and his boxers on the bathroom floor, but there is definitely something to be said for taking the higher moral ground – rise above and ye shall reap the rewards.
Worth a try folks, but be warned, this experiment could go either way. Be ready with wine in case of negative results. I cannot be held accountable for marital upsets, slanging matches or even divorce.
I will leave you with another cautionary tale – I text my husband at 8.30am on a morning when I was heading to work and he was doing the school run – Bear’s third day at ‘big boy school’, to remind him that school started at 8.45am not 9am like pre-school. To which he text back ‘shit, we’re still at home, can’t believe I forgot, we’re going to be late!!!’. My heart sunk. Late in week one, how could he forget?! I reply ‘You can’t be at home, you’re winding me up which is really mean. I’m pregnant, I might cry, are you serious?!’. He keeps me going for several more texts just to punish me before revealing that of course he’s not that stupid and was not late.
I learnt my lesson. Husband’s may have their pitfalls, but more often than not they’re capable, supportive and quite fun to have around.
This one’s for you Bozwerta (yep, pet names…, that’s a whole other story).